Captains

Our roster of likely Captains changes over time, and it is difficult to keep a list up to date. Because of this, the list below is of prominant system members who have acted as Captains since we have begun tracking them to the date at which we've updated this page.

The reason we call them Captains is because they play a very similar role in our conscious mind to the captain of a large ship. They may not front and pilot our vessel from moment to moment, but the current acting Captain will sit coconscious with the Bridge Crew and set the baseline assumptions and feeling of our collective conscious identity. Their name will be a name we reflexively answer to besides "Inmara" or whomever is fronting at the moment, and their pronouns will be the most comfortable pronouns for the whole coconscious group. The Captain will be the one whose sense of identity and gender will be used to emotionally react to all external stimuli while the fronter or Pilot chooses the actions to take. Sometimes, the only system member that is conscious is the Captain, in which case they will also be the Pilot.

List of Notable Past Captains

• Eh
• Anne the Girl
• Anne the Dragon
• Breq
• Fenmere
• Phage
• Benejede
• Morde
• Tetcha
• Gnargrim
• Brenna
• Gesedege
• Jonathan the 'Hamster

Why we don't use the terms "host" or "gatekeeper" for our captains

On 10/20/2020, Breq had this to share about experiencing their role as captain:

Last night, during game, Gnargrim got the first attack in a round of combat and threw together a nice big dice pool to make a roll. But their opponent had larger dice, and it rolled really well and Gnargrim rolled very poorly.

And up until that point, Gnargrim has generally had the advantage in fights in this game, so they reflexively had their characteristic smugness upon going into combat. And it didn't pan out the way they expected.

And suddenly, for the next three or four sentences they were not in the front anymore, and someone else had to speak for them.

And it was really jarring and kinda cool. Because we just couldn't use Gnargrim's voice when they weren't there.

They came back to finish the combat by next round, after thinking about things and regaining their composure.

As captain, I experienced this in third person perspective, giving the orders to talk and in some cases dictating the words to be used, but unable to fully control who was talking or just exactly what they were saying.

And this is a pretty good example of how our system works most of the time.

It's why we use "captain" instead of "host" or "gatekeeper" to describe the role I'm often in. Because the captain provides the central perspective of consciousness most of the time, and directs most of our actions, but everyone else on the bridge actually does everything, and each member of the bridge crew has final control over whether or not they're there and participating.

Like, I can't gatekeep. I can't keep someone else out. And I don't generally talk. I just make suggestions and help everyone coordinate. Host is probably closer in description to our role of captain, but it feels too much like a reference to "original consciousness" or "host of a parasite", like the owner of the body, and that's NOT what I or any other captain is. We don't like the confusion of that word.

- Breq